Tag Archives: silence

Looking through Brokenness to Healing

If I counted the times throughout my life I was hurt, rejected and cast off, I could say I was broken daily. The world will do that to you. It breaks you. It tears you up inside. It makes you choose sides. city-1868530_1920

We watch five minutes of news and see the travesties, the hopelessness, the wicked ambitions. Innocent suffer. The world seems to be falling apart in pieces that cannot mend.

We see no way out. We wonder why things happen the way they do. Our emotions rip us from the inside out, then tear our minds into shards of confusion trying to make sense of it all.

Isaiah 12:2 Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation.

We see very clear we are broken. We may see no way out. No help coming. We question God in everything we experience in life, aching to see answers and provision, healing.

Sometimes God allows us to be broken. And it’s okay if we break. alone-2666433_1920

Exodus 33:14 My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.

God picks up the pieces with a patient expertise only his master craftsmanship can heal.

He is constant. Always working toward a path to give us healing. He sees roadblocks as opportunities. Pain as conditioning. He will use hardships to teach us perseverance, lessons in disguise.

So the world is broken, but aren’t we all?

Some of the most gorgeous windows were ones broken to make stained glass. Glass is deliberately made in sheets, then broken into pieces. Chunks of disaster. Hopeless messes.

Aren’t we all hopeless messes without a maker to turn us into masterpieces? adult-1869621_1920

Psalm 9:9-10 The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.

We say: “Ah Lord I can’t do this anymore.” And he speaks in a whisper through the brokenness: “Ah, but I already have a plan through your brokenness, I have you. You are mine. I will take these broken pieces and bless them.”

The world may be broken, but God is not.

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.


This is how Unexpected Disappointments are Really Blessings in Disguise

You wanted that job promotion, but someone else got it. You wanted to get off work early to have time with your family but that last minute customer walked in five minutes before closing. You wanted that new car but don’t have the money saved to put down on it yet. You were a day late to put in an offer on your dream home. You really needed that product to sell so you can pay some bills that has been biting you from the inside out for a while now. Those bullies at school just won’t stop.

The list goes on and on. But you were disappointed. It hurt. It made you question God’s

Disappointments make us question God and our ability to navigate life

motives for your life, and maybe even you got mad.

You just needed a break. An incentive. Some good news or opportunity in life to keep you going. But it doesn’t happen, you leave disappointed. It leaves you confused, questioning your ability to navigate life, make decisions and you think: “Why am I even alive?!”

Every single disappointment throttled at you forces you to look at God. People say we are in control of our destiny, that we make the decisions, that we walk the path we set for ourselves. But you look at your life and say: “This wasn’t me! I wanted to do better! I want to be better! This is not the path I wanted…

And then it happens.

And then it happens: something forces you to look at your disappointments 

Something forces you to look at your disappointments. You’re late for work one morning because your toddler just won’t stop being difficult, and when you finally get to leave you realize on the way there was a fatal wreck. It could have been you, your child.

That job promotion you were desperate for? Yea, that one. The department folded, laying everyone off shortly after giving promotions. That could have been you.

Leaving work early to have some down time and that last minute customer walks in? Yea, that one. That person needed you. They needed help, a resolution, and you were the only bridge they had to keep their sanity.

That new car you didn’t have the down payment for? Well, they are now recalling them and due to engine problems have killed several consumers by now.

Disappointments happen and years later, you look back and see they were really blessings in disguise, you just couldn’t see it then…

That dream home you missed out putting an offer on? The builder of that home is getting sued because they cut corners, so now the buyers are stuck in litigation and forced to deal with a badly built house.

Dealing with bullies? Want to give up and hide somewhere? Yea, God sees that too. He also sees where those type of people will end up, but he sees forging strengths in you to be a better person will matter years down the road when your own kids get bullied, or someone you know at work.

God sees every path you are on in life, and he knows how to veer you to the right one that will be in your best interests. 

We cry during our disappointments, when in reality, God sees it as opportunities to give you something better, to keep you from something much worse. He sees the road you may be on as choices you made, but he can veer those choices to direct us to the right path and when that happens, we call them disappointments. We get frustrated at our circumstances and question God, when God is the one who sees it all.

He doesn’t want you to take a promotion where you will get laid off or be subject to hardships that is not in your best interests. He doesn’t want you to buy a bad home or car. He knows bullies, and he also knows every single thing you are subjected to in life will make you stronger to stand up for yourself and others and do the right thing.

God has plans to prosper you, not to harm you. To give you a hope and a future. One day, those disappointments you have or are enduring will force you to look at God and say: “Thank you.”

Life is full of unexpected disappointments. They hurt. They make us angry and we question God. But God says: “For I know the plans I have for you. Declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11



The God of the Intricate When Life Spins Out of Control

We tend to question God when things get tough. When things don’t go our way. We tend to give up too easily when God just wants us to wait on him first.

We rush ahead. We race forward. We don’t listen. We think we know everything.

We throw our fists to the sky first and laugh in his face when life happens, because let’s face it, life happens to go in ways we have no control over.

People die. People lose it all. Futures crumble, we think, but oh friend, God even controls the future we fear will never be. ID-100255203

Life spins out of control and we wonder where God is at and why things happen the way they do. But they do. Life happens. Hard things happen. But even in the miraculous splendor of living, glories burst from the flames. Life sprouts from death. Healing begins, and God mends. 

It takes time to mend a web. If you have ever watched a spider weave a web, the intricacies and details of perfection are a masterful art. And that’s just a spider web. Imagine the intricacies of human existence. The master of life must, after all, take his time to weave perfection.

Beauty takes time. Healing takes time. Although we tend to wonder why God never showed up yesterday, when in reality, he was there all along.

The same God who created such intricate design, the one who was with us during our painful pasts, the same one who watches us now, is the same one who walks in our future.

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The God of intricate design, the one who tells you now: “It’s okay friend. I see where you’ve been. I know where you are now, I know where you are going. Trust me.”

Trust him. If the creator of the spider, who can make an intricate web of art, can make a small creature with talent, He can do so much more with you.






The Day God told me to Kneel at the Ocean

I took a walk on the beach today. You know that silence you feel through your bones when you are all alone and all you see is endless miles of sandy beaches and a vast, raging ocean? Yea that one.

I was there today.

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I stood gasping at this marvel before me, the wind whipping at my suntanned skin, the spray from the salty ocean teasing me.

I’ve done this before. Only today, it was different. After years of attacks, battles and losses, hopes and dreams coming to pass, miraculous provision, and exhaustion…

I stood there at the mighty feet of God Almighty, and said one of many prayers into the horizon. Sometimes life is too overwhelming and we say things like: “God will never give you more than you can bear…” And then it happens. You get throttled with a pain that you cannot bear, and it hits you: “Who can bear this?”

There is only one who can.

He spoke to me, and said: “Pray before me.” So I did.

Then he whispered: “Kneel before me at this ocean.” And the first thought that hit me was not to fall on my knees to serve my creator. The first thought that hit me was: “But…I don’t want my butt to get wet, I have to drive home, I didn’t bring a towel to sit on.”

And then it happened.

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I did as I was asked, and I walked to the ocean and I knelt on my knees. I closed my eyes and prayed, expecting for waves to throttle me and soak me at any moment.

But they didn’t.

When I opened my eyes, I saw the waves coming up to caress my fingers in the sand, and then retreated. The waves came up to form circles around me, past me, but never right at me. My butt did not get wet.

I heard this: “I even care that you were worried your butt would get wet.”

Then I thought of Job. He endured heartaches, financial losses and physical grief we may never know.

I heard God whisper: “Job’s end was better than his beginning.”

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I sat there on my knees, the gentle caressing of the waves playing with my fingers, then retreating back to form silky ripples in the sand. I cried. I cried because God cares so much that something so small and insane as my worry about getting my butt wet mattered to him.

He reads every thoughts. He knows every hearts intentions. And he cares.

You know what? Even if the waves had of gotten me soaked, I would have still enjoyed sitting there praying. I would have drove home on a wet seat. But it would have all been okay.

So the next time life pummels you with a raging ocean of worries, just trust that God is right there with you. After all, if he can care that I didn’t have a towel with me, he can certainly care about whatever it is worrying you now. We should know this, but sometimes it takes a vast, lonely beach and endless raging ocean to make us see it.